Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
