Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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