i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize