i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
