So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
