What a fucking waste of an outfit
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
