His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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