Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
