he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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