They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
