I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize