dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
