My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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