Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize