it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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