What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
God, I missed his penis.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
