Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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