he wants to bone in the snuggie
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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