i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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