He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
