Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
she woke up with a sticky ear
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
