Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize