I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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