But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
