so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Just high enough for therapy.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
