kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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