White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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