fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
