You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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