I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
This girl is more easily done than said...
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
