I like to think it a success when the cops are called
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
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