sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
