Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test

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(503): View more from Oregon

I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?

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(530): View more from California

Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Another day, another engagement, another cat

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(229): View more from Georgia

Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?

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(367): View more from

He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

who are you?

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