I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Randomize
