she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
