when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
