What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
