Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
