my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
