But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
