Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Randomize
