Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
