It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize