I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
