I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
