Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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