Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
you have to choose: penises or morals?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
