how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize