she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
