Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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