somebody snuck up and got me drunk
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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