He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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