we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
